Princess Twilight
by onpermanenthaitus
Summary: Its the Princess Bride but with Twilight twist Please R&R! dont let the name fool you.... it will be good! T for minor language oh and all human except for jacob who cames back as a RAT! he-he mental image :p
1. prolouge

Okay so this whole chapter is pretty much an authors note and I decided to publish it for 3 reasons: I need to make sure I

Okay so this whole chapter is pretty much an authors note and I decided to publish it for 3 reasons: I need to make sure I know how to publish/post these and I just want to explain the idea and the character match up list.

Okay so my idea is pretty much a mix of my two favorite stories-twilight and the princess bride- and I decided that I would use the twilight characters in the princess bride storyline.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own the super-fantabulous Twilight characters OR The Princess Bride

Character match up ( who is who if you have seen the movie )

Buttercup……………………………………………………………… Bella

Wesley…………………………………………………………………... Edward

Fezzik……………………………………………………………………. Emmett

Inyego……………………………………………………………………. Jasper

Humperdink…………………………………………………………… Mike

Miracle Max………………………………………………………….. Carlisle

Valerie (Maxes wife)……………………………………………Esme

6 Fingered Man……………………………………………………. James

The Albino………………………………………………………………. Rosalie

Vezzini? (guy who says inconceivable)……………… Jacob

King………………………………………………………………………….. Tyler

Annoying Pastor…………………………………………………….. Alice

Crazy old lady from the dream………………………….. Jessica

Giant Rat………………………………………………………………… JACOB!! (a.n. I don't like him very much….. have you noticed)

I forgot his name so yea…

2 reasons: I could imagine Alice with that kind of lisp and I couldn't think of anyone else so I just used Rosalie, bear with me please.

Do you think that would be interesting or should I just not write it…. My real first chapter will be up as soon as I can. PLEASE REVIEW!

p.s. I am a very slow writer and I am busy but I will post as fast as I can and if you want to flame please give reasons why ( eg I hate this because…. )


	2. Chapter 1

A

**A.N. okay so this is the real first chapter…. Enjoy**

**Disclaimer: Warning the ultra-fantabulous-super-tastic Twilight and Princess Bride are NOT mine**

**Well enough of this… on with the story…. Oh and I do switch POV's a lot**

Narrator

This story takes place on a country-side farm where a beautiful young lady named Bella lived with a farmhand, a young man named Edward. In her free time you could find Bella either riding her horse or bossing Edward around, He never complained either, he would always answer her with "as you wish" but what she didn't know was that he meant was "I love you".

BPOV

I was bored and I noticed that Farmboy was finished grooming my horse, I was about to go ride when I realized he would have nothing left to do so naturally I gave him more chores "Farmboy?" he stopped and look at me " Go fetch some water." He looked at me and replied "As you wish"

It was a few weeks later and I was in my kitchen when Edward returned with more water, I hadn't noticed he was in the doorway until he asked

"where would you like it?" his voice was dazzling and his bright green eyes were even more stunning. I found myself at a loss of words

"R-r-right there is f-fine" was all I could get out. I was almost positive I truly loved him but I wasn't sure so I called to him

"Farmboy… fetch me a pitcher" the pitcher was right over my head. He eyed me carefully and slowly walked over, never taking his eyes off me. It was then, when we were staring into each others eyes, that we realized we truly loved eachother.

Since that day I have treated him with utmost respect. We were happy and soon to be married when he came to me with the worst news.

**A.n. Mwhahaha I love cliffies… well not really but still I promise to update really soon…. Maybe even this weekend**

**Well not that the chappies finished you might be bored but have no fear the shiney blue review button is here!**


	3. Chapter 2

A

**A.N. Okay I pretty much hyperventilated when I saw how many hits this got in a matter of hours! Thanks.**

**Disclaimer: what do I own…. The characters..? NO! The storyline..? NO! I own nothing!**

**Well on with the story…**

BPOV

"I won't let you go!" I yelled

"I wish not to leave you but I must and I will only be gone 3 or 4 years." He carefully argued back

"But why does the ship need you?And right now?" I could now feel the tears running down my cheeks now but I could care less.

" I'm not exactally sure, but I am sure I have to go"

"I fear I will not see you again."

"But this is true love, not even death can stop it." And with this he pulled me into a kiss, then he started walking away.

"I will write you soon!" he called over his shoulder, and then he was gone.

**One year after**

We were still in constant communication and that assured me he was okay.

**Two years after**

The amount of letters we were sending each other has decreased but he was still responding so some of my worries faded

**Three years after**

I havn't gotten a response from Edward in about 6 months and I am really starting to worry about him

**Four years after**

Nothing at all

**Five years after**

Prince Newton has forcefully made me agree to marry him, I really do not want to but my Edward is dead and I have no other choice.

Everyday at about noon I escape the hassles of city life and ride my horse,

But I had a feeling today was not going to be normal.

?POV

Life is hard, I mean how hard is it to think of a way to start a war and get paid? My Brute squad and I were pondering this when it hit me! It actually did, a branch fell from the top of the tree and hit my arm, but that's not the point. The point is that it was then when I heard galloping in the distance and then I saw who was riding, the princess to be. Intantly my plan unfolded in my mind

BPOV

I was riding down the trail when I saw them, grinning at me.

**Please don't hate me! I had to cut it here or it might be too long and I might as-well keep them an even-ish length…. I'm writing the next chapter now so it will hopefully be up tonight. Please review. Thanks again to everyone who put this on favorites/ alert and reviewed! **


	4. Chapter 3

WOW 4 chapters in one day that's a record for me

**WOW 4 chapters in one day that's a record for me!**

**Disclaimer: Only in my dreams will I own Twilight or The Princess Bride.**

**Well on with the story… Hope you like!**

Back-track: I was riding down the train when I saw them, grinning at me…: End back-track

BPOV

They were in the middle of the trail so I was forced to stop or hit them. It was a group of three men, although I couldn't take my eyes off one of them, he was at least 7 feet tall and was huge, especially compared to the guy next to him… a 4 foot mostly bald man. The third guy was at least normal, he was tall with long blonde hair.

"Hello Highness." The short guy – obviously the leader- started

I didn't say anything, I was trying to figure out how high my chances of escape were, I have to admit that they were really low.

"Quiet today, are we?" The bitter voice continued " how about Emmett here helps you remember how to talk?" He laughed and the biggest guy – who must be Emmett- came towards me, his hand up when I yelled

"Wait! What do you want from me!?

"Nothing too eccentric, just for you to co-operate." A shiver ran down my mind. Then, once again, Emmett came towards me and slung me over his shoulder. He didn't seem to notice when I started hitting him on his back with all my might.

We came across a fair sized ship and I was thrown aboard.

It was twilight when I arose from an involuntary sleep. I looked around, the tall blonde guy was steering and looking kind-of anxious, I even noticed some things I never had before; his eyes were a beautiful blue with little goldish specs in them that seemed to glow, he carried a remarkable looking sword in his belt, he had two slashes on his face- one on each cheek one inch out from his nose up to his ears- I wondered where he got them and he kept glancing behind us.

I had also noticed what I believe is Emmett's weakness, he doesn't have very good balance… as if he's top-heavy. And, of course, the short-bald guy didn't really have anymore physical qualities exept his skin was kind of a russet colour, but other than that, the only thing I did notice was that he says 'inconceivable' quite often.

I happened to think of and escape plan when I noticed Emmett was watching my every move so I lapsed into a phoney slumber and I could hear him walk away. Perfect.

Jaspers POV (tall blond guy)

I swear I can see something resembling a boat in the distance. I look back, its still there but my thoughts were interrupted

"Stop that!" Jacob screamed in my face

"Stop what?" I said, looking back again

"THAT! Stop looking behind you!"

"But I think we are being followed…" I started

"Nonsense! There is no way anyone knows what we have done yet… they are probably late-night fishermen so stop worrying." Jacob snapped.

I was about to roll my eyes but I was interrupted by a 'splash'

**I have to stop it there but once again I will post asap! ( Most likely tonight ) please review…. It will make me write faster I promise!**


	5. Chapter 4

Wow 93 hits in 4 hours, I'm officially amazed but I only have 2 reveiws

**Wow 93 hits in 4 hours, I'm officially amazed but I only have 2 reveiws. Whats up with that? Oh well… enough of this, imma get on with the story.Also wow: I have written 5 chapters today and they have been posted too.**

**Disclaimer: Yuppers I own it!... HAPPY OPPOSITE DAY!**

Backtrack: I was about to roll my eyes but I was interrupted by a 'splash': End-backtrack.

JPOV

Out of instinct I jumped up, just in time to see that Bella girl attempting to swim away. Yes I said attempted because her heavy dress was making her sink. Then I heard the most deafening screech

BPOV

Now was my chance, all of them were distracted, with that final thought I jumped into the freezing cold water and attempted to very quickly swim to the 'ship' in the distance but my dress what too heavy and I almost drowned when I heard a very high pitched shriek and something slimy brush up against my leg. By now I had stopped trying to swim and looked back, in horror , to the ship where Jacob was glancing-amused- at me. Then he yelled,

"Hear that Highness? Those are the shrieking eels-" he was interrupted when a 6 foot long eel swam past me.

"They only shriek like that when they are about to feast on human flesh," He paused, clearly amused.

"Swim back now and I promise you no harm, I doubt you'll get such an offer from the eels." All of the sudden I saw his eyes widen, I turned and **( an. I was going to stop it there but that would be evil wouldn't it? ) **I turned and screamed, there was a very large eel heading straight for me, it's mouth wide open, it shrieked one last time and was inches away from me when a very large hand came and hit it on the head while another hand reached down, grabbed me and pulled me back into the ship. **(an. the boat came over but she didn't notice) **I have never felt more relieved to have Emmetts hands on me.

"Now what have we learned Highness?" Jacobs voice was. mocking.

I just sat there, quiet, for the rest of the trip.

**Sorry its short but its 3:10 am while i'm writing this… I will write more very soon I promise.**

**For those who havn't realized, Jacob it the short bald guys Bella was talking about.**

**Please review!**


	6. Chapter 5

**Wow I am amazed! I have gotten over 130 hits!**

**Well I have almost all the chapters written out umm… if anyone has any humor ideas or something for my next story, I'm open to options!**

**Disclaimer: I'm pretty sure if you're this far you already know. I don't own it!**

**On with the story!**

BPOV

Then it was dawn. I awoke to Jacob yelling the name Jasper- whom I assume is the 3rd guy-they were arguing until Jasper looked back again and gasped,

"I-it's still t-there" he stuttered

"What are yo-"Jacob didn't get to finish

"The s-ship, see" he pointed

"Inconceivable! We havn't even made it to Galdor yet! HA! But we are _here_, there they are, the Cliffs of Insanity!"

The boat stopped and I looked up, the cliffs were over 1000ft. high. I gulped and was snapped out of my trance when Emmett picked me up, this time I did not struggle. I was set on a firm, rocky surface when I noticed the long rope descending from the top and Jasper strapping something to Emmett. It has 3 loops, I bit my lip, hard, to keep from yelping. Once again I was snapped out of my trance but this time by Jasper,

"Just sit, in the loop, hang on, don't move and you'll be fine." He assured me, I sat in a loop to Emmett's side and followed directions. Then Emmett was climbing the rope, and he was carrying 3 people, I was truly amazed. For what seemed like the hundredth time, my thought were interrupted

"Were safe, only Emmett is strong enough to get up this way." Jacob sounded triumphant and pleased at the same time.

"He's Climbing The Rope!" Jasper yelled I looked down, sure enough he was and he was gaining. **(an. I am making Jasper really observant in this chapter)**

"Inconceivable!" Jacob yelled as Emmett climbed onto the ledge. Once we were up Jacob laughed bitterly and pulled out a knife. I gasped, was he going to kill me here and now? I breathed a sigh of relief when he started to cut the rope, then I realized that the man coming after us was going to fall and die. It was too late, the rope broke and it slid over to the ledge, then fell. I gasped again, Jasper- being as observant as he was- looked over the edge.

"MY GAWD! HE'S CLIMBING!" he yelled

"We don't have time for such silly games, we have to hurry before her fiance' finds her." Jacob started "Jasper you stay here and make sure he doesn't come after us, if you know what I mean. If he falls fine, if not, you do it!" once again I was grabbed by Emmett and we left, leaving Jasper behind.

JPOV

While I was waiting I practiced some dodges and lunges. This was getting boring. I looked down, he hasn't seemed to have moved at all, so I, being as impatient as I was, I called to him, hoping he would hurry.

"Hey there" I called

"humg- Hello…" he replied in a strained voice

"Um, do you mind hurrying up a little?" I asked.

" Look, this isn't as easy as it looks so if your just standing around up there you could at least make yourself useful and throw down a vine or a rope or something."

"I'm not sure you want to accept my help, considering I am only waiting around to kill you." I answer

"Well that definatly puts a damper on our relationship." Once again he said in a strained voice.

"I promise you will make it to the top alive." I said truthfully

"I'm sorry but you'll just have to wait."

"I hate waiting." I said to myself

"Can I give you my word as a Spaniard?" I asked

"No go-uh-good I've known too many Spaniards"

"I swear on my fathers life… you will make it to the tope alive." I said in my most sincere voice.

"Throw me the rope." He groaned

**Well that's the new chapter, what did you think? Please review!**

**I'll have the next chapter up soon, That's a promise.**


	7. Chapter 6

Wow 266 hits since Friday

**Wow 266 hits since Friday! I am impressed, but I think 5 reviews is kind of sad for that amount of views, don't you? I know you guys can do better then that, if you hate it and that's why you don't then let me know so I can fix it. Anywayz enough of my rant, on with the story.**

**Oh a thanks to Bookflower for informing me I have been spelling Spaniard wrong, I will fix it as soon as I can ********.**

**Disclaimer: I.DO.NOT.OWN.ANYTHING!**

JPOV

I quickly took the remainder of the rope from around the rock it was wrapped around and tossed it down to him. He was up in a matter of minuets, as soon as he was up he pulled out his sword

"No, no you should rest first." I paused "Do you by any chance have six fingers on your right hand?"

He raised and eyebrow,

"Do you always start conversations this way?"

"My father was slaughtered by a six fingered man, I was luck and he only left me with these" I traced my finger across across the slashes on my cheeks "But that was when I was young, I have spent the past thirty years training so when I finally meet up with him again I can say 'Hello, my name is Jasper Whitlock, you kill' my father, prepare to die'."

"May I ask _why_ he killed your father?"

"My father was sent to find a special sword for him" I pulled out my sword and held it out for him to see "When he came back, my father refused to give it to him, and that was it. Six fingered man stabbed my father right through the heart. I loved my father. I challenged six fingered man to a duel but I was young and inexperienced so he gave me these and left." I explained.

"Oh…well I suppose we should get on with it then" he said

"Are you sure you're ready?"

"Ready or not, you've been more then fair."

With that, I got up and drew my sword. Then we were fighting, I noticed we were both using out left hands. **(AN. READ THIS! I want you to imagine the most exiting and dramatic swordfight you can with the following; a lot of 'galloping', flips, matrix-like dodges and no bloodshed 'scause they don't get hit. It was just to hard for me to write everytime I tried it sounded like the cheesiest thing ever so just imagine it with the following dialogue. Thanks.)**

"I like your technique." He said to me, obviously commenting on the fact that I just back-flipped over his blade

-Sword-fight continues-

I had to admit this was the most exiting sword-fight I had been in for a long time, and he was amazing

-Awsome-tastic sword-fight continues-

"I must admit, you are exellent, even better than I." I said with a smile

"Then why are you smiling?"

"Because I know something you do not know" I started he looked at me questioningly "I am not left handed." With that I threw my sword up in the air with my left and caught it with my right. I looked at him, he was smiling, go- wait! Why was he smiling?

"Why are _you_ smiling?" I asked

"Because, I am not left handed either." And he switched hands

-More super sword-fighting-

This sword-fight was truly remarkable an-

I gasped and fell to my knees, he had just knocked my sword out of my hands. I knew better then to run and try to get it, this would be the end of me.

"You are a truly amazing Spaniard and I hate to do this, but I can't have you following me. Please forgive me." I awaited for the sharp pain and the warm/wet sensation, but it didn't come. I opened my eyes just in time to see him hit me on the head with the handle of his sword. As I blacked out I heard him run off, and then it was dark.

**So, did you hate it? Love it? Please take the 30 seconds it takes to write a review and let me know. Oh by the way, 'galloping' is when you have like one foot in front of the other and your sideways and you kind of 'hop' forward and back. I will update soon I promise! **


	8. Chapter 7

Hey sorry it's been like a week since I last updated but school has been really hectic so to make up for it I will post as ma

**Hey sorry it's been like a week since I last updated but school has been really hectic so to make up for it I will post as many chapters as I can this weekend. **

**Okay so I have been told that my story is too much like the actual Princess Bride, so if anyone has some suggestions as a scene please let me know and I will try and put it in my story. All idea's will be considered!**

**Disclaimer: If I owned twilight or The Princess Bride I wouldn't be on Fan-fiction, now would I?**

**On with the story.**

Jacob's POV

My mind went wild as I thought of all the possible outcomes of the swordfight between Jasper and the 'Masked Stranger' as I referred to him as, when I saw a movement in the distance- I held my breath- it was a large black figure, if I didn't know better I would have sworn it was a bear. But since I did know better I realized it was the –gasp- Masked Stranger!

"Inconceivable! He's still alive!" I exclaimed

"You know I do not think that means what you think it means," Emmett-the know-it-all- said to me

"I do not pay you to think, now I want you to wait for him to come and then take care of him… Your way!"

"My way?" Wow he was 'slow'

"Yes your way, hide behind this rock and when his _head_ is in sight, throw a rock at it!" I snapped

"My way is not very sportsman-like." He said with a slight frown

"Well that's not _my_ problem is it? Now get ready, he's coming." With that I grabbed highness by the arm and dragged her up the trail.

EmPOV (Emmett)

"Well that's not my problem is it?" Jacob asked, Then he grabbed the princesses arm and left

I had nothing against this guy, so I really didn't want to hurt him. But then I heard footsteps, I picked up a nearby rock and held it behind my head. I saw a black figure come into view **(Please forgive me I'm not trying to be racist he's wearing all black and has a black hood and mask so sorry if I offend anyone)** I threw a rock, purposely missing. The rock it another and exploded. His eyes widened and within a second he had his sword pulled out protectively.

"Show yourself." He demanded.

I stepped out from behind the boulder, he gaped at my size **(Sorry if the next bit really sucks, it was kinda hard to write.)**

"I take it you want me dead?" He asked already knowing the answer

"I didn't have to miss you know." I responded

"I believe you,"

"Back to the whole _dead_ thing, I personally have nothing against you but yes, that about sums it up." I picked up another rock

"Before we begin," he started "I would like to point out that even with my sword you could still easily win with your rock. So how 'bout we settle this like gentlemen, No weapons, just our own bodies. I'll put down my sword and you'll put down your…Rock." I had no idea what he was thinking because I was at least twice the size of him. I dropped my rock nonetheless and sure enough he dropped his sword.

We both stood in defensive stances, well actually he did, I just stood normal. Finally something happened, he lunged at me, I could tell he was really trying. He backed up, I stepped forward to grab him but he ducked and moved out of the way.

"Your quick." I told him, next think I knew he was on my back, trying to put me into a sleeper hold.

MSPOV (masked stranger)

"Your quick." He informed me, I ran around, then jumped on his back, squeezing my arms around his neck, trying to put him in a sleeper-hold but he was just too big. Suddenly I felt him stumble, as if he was dizzy.

'it's working' I thought, when I felt something very hard slam against my back, he was running me into boulders.

"I just realized why I am having such a hard time fighting you," he said unexpectedly "I am-" we hit another rock "So used to fighting groups of about fifteen people and I havn't fought just one person in a long time."

He fell to his knees. I gave a really tight finishing squeeze and he collapsed. I rolled him over and listened to his heartbeat.

"Still alive." I whispered to myself

"You'll be fine but you'll have a massive headache when you wake up." I got up and ran up the trail.

I ran until I found a large opening- a meadow-, in the middle of it sat a small man and beside him, blindfolded, with a knife to her neck sat the princess

"Inconceivable," I heard him mutter.

**Who is this masked stranger? Why does he want Bella? What do you think the answers are? Anyways what do you think? I'll update soon!**


	9. Chapter 8

Okay well, as promised a second chapter for today

**Okay well, as promised a second chapter for today. Starting soon the storyline will start to change. Remember if you have idea's please let me know and I will read and consider them.**

**Disclaimer: Hmm well I have run out of interesting things to say so I guess I can only say this, I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT OR PRINCESS BRIDE.**

**On with the story I suppose**

MSPOV

"Inconceivable," I heard the stranger mutter

"Take one more step and Highness gets it." He threatened

I stopped

"Smart man," he started "You have beaten my Spaniard, which means you are a good swordsman and you have beaten my giant which means you are exceptionally strong, I am neither so I challenge you to a battle of wits."

"For the princess?" I questioned

"For the princess." He returned

"To the _death_?" I asked

"To the death, now get on with it!" he snapped

"Here," I said handing him a tiny capsule "What do you smell?"

"I do not smell a thing." His voice questioning

"What you do not smell is call Iocane powder, it is scentless, tasteless, dissolves instantly in liquid and is among the more deadly poisons known to man," I paused "Pour the wine."

He warily obeyed and set the now full glasses on the tree stump in front of him. I quietly grabbed the glasses and the Iocane and turned my back to him. I poured the Iocane in and placed them on the stump again. After a small silence I finally spoke

"All you have to do is figure out which glass has the poison in it and we will both drink, winner gets the princess. May the battle of wits begin." I grinned slightly.** (An, it gets sort of confusing soon so watch out)**

"That's it? Its so simple! All I have to do is take everything I know about you and see if you're the kind of person who would be afraid and put the poison as far away from themselves as possible or if you are the kind of person who would try to be brave, put the poison in his own glass and hope for the best.." he was just beginning his rant and I knew it, I accidentally started to think about other thing and when I realized that I have tuned him out I quickly started to pay attention, he was saying something like this,

"-that, But! I know that Iocane originates in Australia and the people in Australia are mostly criminals and would put the poison far away from themselves so I can clearly not pick the wine in front of me, but you must have known that I would know where Iocane originates so I can clearly not pick the wine in front of you. You must have known that I would know that you would know that I would know so I can clearly not pick the wine in front of me," He probably would have kept going on, and on but I interrupted.

"Have you made your decision then?" I asked hopeful.

"Not at all!" he practically screamed

"I knew that you must have known that I would know that you would know that I would know that so I can clearly not pick the wine in front of you." **(I told you it got confusing)**

"Your stalling." I accused

"That's what you think!" once again he practically screamed. Then he continued his rant for a few more minutes before stopping, pointing into the distance and yelling

"What in the world is that?!" I quickly turned and he did exactly what I thought, he switched the glasses. I turned back and he looked quite pleased, I had to use nearly every fiber of my being not to laugh at the pitiful creature in front of me.

"I have made my decision, we shall drink, me from my glass and you from yours." He lifted his glass as a toast, I did the same and then we drank.

**Evil aren't I? Well I actually don't have much to say except thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far, your thoughts are greatly appreciated. Please review! I'll update ASAP! **


	10. Chapter 9

525 hits

**525 hits! That is better then I thought I would get for my entire story! Thanks to everyone who reviewed ********. I've gotten some great ideas so far!**

**Disclaimer: Sadly I do not own Twilight or The Princess Bride.**

**On with the story**

Back-track—"I have made my decision, we shall drink, me from my glass and you from yours." He lifted his glass as a toast, I did the same. Then we drank.—End-back-track

MSPOV

I finished drinking and set down my glass at about the same time he did

"Wrong answer." I said smiling

"That's what you think! I switched the glasses while you weren't looking. You fell for the oldest trick in the book!" He paused, I grinned slightly

"Why are you grinning? You are about to die!" he yelled,

I just repeated what I had said before

"Wrong answer."

"STOP SAYING THAT! FOR THE LAST TIME, I SWITCHED THE GLASSES! DO I HAVE TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU? YOU. ARE. GOING. TO. DI—" He was cut off, his smile turned into a look of pain and he fell over. Dead.

I quickly ran over to the princess and gently pulled off her blindfold. Instead of looking scared or shocked she looked…intrigued?

"Who would have thought the poison was in your own glass the whole time…but how did you know he would switch them?" she spoke quickly, my jaw almost dropped. I was not expecting that, shock/fear-yes but amazement? I gained enough composure to speak

"Wrong again." I said not bothering to answer how I knew

"I don't understand.." she started

"They were both poisoned." I said simply "Well we sho-" I didn't get to finish

"If they were both poisoned then why aren't you dead?" she asked frantically, I sighed

"I spent the past 5 years building up an immunity to it." Her lips formed an 'o' shape. I helped her up.

"C'mon lets go." I said and started walking, she struggled but eventually gave in, then I started to run.

We ran for about three kilometers before I stopped and let go of her

"Take a quick break, then we shall continue." She panted then answered

"Who are you?"

"No one of consequence." I replied, she groaned then gasped

"You're the dread pirate Roberts aren't you?"

I smiled and bowed slightly

"At your service…" she looked fearful then angry

"Why did you do it?" she screamed

I knew exactly what she was talking about but I acted confused

"You killed him! Why did you kill my Edward?!" she yelled, I tried to act confused but a slight smile appeared on my face

"I've killed many people but I think I might remember this Edward, what was he like?"

"Well he was tall, bronze hair, stunning green eyes, he was very polite…helping?" she asked

"Like I said I think I can remember him," I started "He died very well, not blubbering or begging, he simply said 'please, spare me" when I asked why he replied 'true love' I had to explain to him that if I let him go, word would go around and people would think I went soft. So I made a deal with him, I would hill him quickly." I finished explaining. She lunged at me, fist in the air, no doubt to hit me. She swung her hand at me and at the same time I stepped to the side and her fist hit the boulder I had just been leaning on. She looked in great pain. I walked over to her, extended a hand to help her up, she glared at it for a moment then roughly took it. I was not expecting what came next, she smiled evily, I glanced behind me and noticed he were standing right in front of a very steep hill, I knew exactly what she was going to do and I braced myself.

"I could care less if… if you just died right now!" she cried then shoved me, causing me to fall down the hill. Without thinking I yelled

"AAASSS-YYYOOOUUU-WWWIIISSSHHH…"

**Mwhahaha, suspense builds character and so does updating so I'm gunna build some character soon :p… Review please! I am still looking for idea's of events I can put in this story, if you have any please let me know!**


	11. Chapter 10 redo of 8 & 9

Holy crap

**Holy crap! Nearly 800 hits! Wow.**

**Okay so you don't actually have to read this chapter because it is pretty much the last 2 chapters in Bella's POV because I got a request asking for that. So here it is, enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: The only way I will own Twilight or the Princess Bride is if the people who really died and the world burst into flames and I was the only one still alive. Even then I really don't think I would own it-sigh-.**

**On with the story**

BPOV

Jacob pulled me away from Emmett and up the trail, as we were walking I heard a rock-or what I hope was a rock- get hit and smash but we didn't stop until we came across a meadow type place. He dragged me over beside a stump and forced me to sit down, tying a cloth over my eyes, I heard him sit down next to me.

"Don't move." He warned and I felt something cold make contact with the skin on my neck, my body immediately tensed. I heard footsteps, and they were way to light and quick to be Emmett's.

"Inconceivable." I heard Jacob whisper, I heard the footsteps slow

"Take one more step and highness gets it!" Jacob threatened and I felt the cold blade type thing press harder against my neck, the footsteps stopped.

"Smart man," Jacob started but I didn't care to listen. I started to think of Prince Newton and not matter how much I despise him, I would rather be with him right now. That's saying something.

Uncontrolled my thought drifted to Edward, my sweet Edward and how he was probably slaughtered by the Dread Pirate Roberts.

"I know that Iocane originates in Australia …" Jacob ranted, gawd, he could go on for hours. I tried to stop paying attention and remember the first time I realized I loved Edward but my thoughts were interrupted

"What in the world is that?!" Jacob screamed and I felt his body shift

"I have made my decision, we shall drink, me from my glass, and you from yours." I heard Jacob drink loudly beside me when I realized what was going on, Iocane was poured into one of the glasses then Jacob would pick the one he thought didn't have in it, they would drink and one would die- All of this over me? I feel really bad now. I heard the soft sound of the glasses being put back on the stump in front of me

"Wrong answer." I heard someone say

"That's what you think! I switched the glasses while you weren't looking! You fell for the oldest trick in the book!" Jacob started

"Why are you smiling?"

"Wrong answer." The other voice repeated

"STOP SAYING THAT! FOR THE LAST TIME, I SWITCHED THE GLASSES! DO I HAVE TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU? YOU. ARE. GOING. TO. DI-" Jacob didn't finish 'whats going on?' my mind screamed. I felt cool hands graze across my face and take off my blindfold, there were so many questions flowing through my mind that without thinking I blurted one out

"Who would have thought the poison was in your own glass the whole time!…But how did you know he would switch them?"

"Your wrong and I didn't."

"I don't understand…" I really didn't

"They were both poisoned." He said so casually, as if he was talking about the weather or a sports game or something "Well we shou-" I cut him off

"If they were both poisoned then why aren't you dead?" I said frantically, he sighed

"I spent the past 5 years building up an immunity to it." He helped me up "C'mon lets go." And he started walking I tried to stay where I was but I eventually stopped struggling and he ran..

We ran for about 3 kilometers and I thought I was going to pass out, he must have heard my panting because he stopped and let go of my arm

"Take a quick break then we shall continue." He said, his breathing still calm. I tried to control my panting but I couldn't, another question accidentally left my lips

"Who are you?"

"No one of consequence." He replied, consequence? Who does he think he is? Then I gasped

"You're the Dread Pirate Roberts aren't you?" he smiled and bowed slightly,

"At your service…" More hatred then I ever thought possible boiled inside of me, why does he seem so familiar though? I gasped, he killed Edward!

"Why did you do it?" I screamed. A look of confusion crossed his face

"Why did you kill my Edward?" I tried to explain. It happened so quick I cant be sure I didn't imagine it, a smile appeared on his face but was gone as quickly as it came

"I have killed many people but I think I may remember this Edward, what was he like?" he asked

"Well he was tall, bronze hair, stunning green eyes, he was very polite…helping?" I asked

"Like I said I think I can remember him," he started "He died very well, not blubbering or begging, he simply said 'please, spare me" when I asked why he replied 'true love' I had to explain to him that if I let him go, word would go around and people would think I went soft. So I made a deal with him, I would kill him quickly." This was too much, its bad enough Edward is dead but having to talk to the guy who killed him about it was just… just, I couldn't control what came next but next thing I knew I was charging at him, fist in the air, I swung and he moved making it so my fist made contact with the hard rock he was currently leaning against. It hurt. A lot. Tears poured out of my eyes but I quickly wiped them away. He held his hand out to me as if to help me up, I glared daggers at it but quickly decided that would do nothing to help so I roughly took it and stood up.

I noticed we were right beside a large, steep hill and smiled evilly. A look of concern crossed his face and he glanced back his body tensed. I really could care less if he died a long and painful death

"I could care less if… if you just died right now!" I cried and I shoved him with all my strength. His next words sent multiple feelings through me

"AAASSS-YYYOOOUUU-WWWIIISSSHHH…"

**Wow I really hate this chapter, I am still looking for requests for scenes I can add. Please review and tell me your ideas, ALL IDEAS WILL BE CONSIDERED!! Okay well I guess I have nothing else to say except this is my longest chapter so far AANNDD I will review VERY soon.**

**P.s. I think you should know that I will mostly be reviewing on weekends because school is really hectic right now. **


	12. Chapter 11

I have nearly 1000 hits

**I have nearly 1000 hits!! –dances- okay well after the last chapter you guys deserve a new one! Thanks for all the reviews!**

**Disclaimer: tee hee the lawyers can't sue me, because I don't own anything!**

**On with the story**

BPOV

I gasped, he just said 'as you wish'. A picture of my Edward flashed in my mind, this was him. I looked at him, flailing uncontrollably and he tumbled down the hill, and he came to a stop at the bottom, lying motionless. 'Had I just killed him?' my mind screamed. Without thinking I ran and jumped down the hill, superman style** (Lol mental image)**, landing with a thud, I started to roll, eventually slowing to a stop. I groaned then quickly went to see if he was okay.

"Edward? EDWARD?" I screamed

EPOV

I skidded to a halt. 'That was going to leave a mark' I groaned slightly, when she thudded next to me

"Edward? EDWARD?" she screamed in my ear, great now I'm part deaf. I propped myself up on my elbow and shook all the debris out of my hair. I smiled warmly

"Yes?" I asked with a slight chuckle

"Oh Edward I thought you were dead…" she seemed to have tears in her eyes when she pulled me into a hug.

MPOV (Mike)

I stepped in the footprints left from a very recent swordfight

"The loser went this way" I said pointing north-east

"And the winner went that way." I pointed south

"We shall follow the winner; the loser means nothing to me." I hopped back on my horse and whispered 'I will find you my Bella, I swear I will.' And we rode off.

We rode until we came across a scene that looks to have been a fight; I saw a huge body print on the ground

"Someone has beaten a giant here," I exclaimed and kept going up the trail. It was only about 10 minutes before we stopped again. This time in an open field, there was a man sitting-err-lying in the middle, I ran to see if he was okay but I felt no pulse. I noticed there was a capsule on the tree stump next to him, it was small and had a little bit of fine white powder in it, I smelt it and smelt nothing.

"Iocane, I bet my life on it." I smirked, and then a thought dawned on me,

"Whoever has won the swordfight and beaten the giant has killed this man. They have also run off with the princess." Then James said to me

"This is very recent, if we hurry we can catch up to them, but they're also heading directly towards the Fire swamp. He seems intelligent; I doubt he would go in." I was pleased to hear this

"Will we still try to catch them?" I asked hopefully

"Of course." And we rode off (again). We only rode for about three kilometers because we had to stop at the top of a very steep hill. _They_ were there, she looked almost… beaten, and they were—kissing?

EPOV

Her next move I wasn't expecting though, I helped her up and she kissed me!

"I missed you so much," she murmured into my lips, we finally broke apart

"We'd better hurry, prince Newton's assistant James is an amazing 'tracker'"

"Looks like he's too late." I said motioning my head up. Newton and 6 other men were on horses at the top of the hill. She gasped

"Don't worry, the hill is much to steep to ride down and we are already here."

"Where," she asked

"The Fire swamp, c'mon." I pulled her along the trail and into the Fire swamp. Ignoring the angry shouts coming from Newton.

**Okay well there is the new chapter, hope you liked! I think this might be last one for this week, sorry. Please review with comments, criticism AND new scene ideas! I will probably update within a week.**


	13. Chapter 12

**1248 hits, 8 favorites and 7 alerts… apparently this story is quite popular, yay!**

**Okay so a couple of announcements;**

**I just want to say happy belated birthday to my good friends –Briawna' and my friends Casey who sadly doesn't have and account.**

**I'm sorry for not updating sooner but school has been very hectic and I have a few assignments that I still haven't finished because in class while I'm supposed to be working on them I'm writing the story.**

**Disclaimer: kshsujrn****I****csajhfb****DON'T****asiudnas****OWN****askdjidn****IT!****... wow that was hard to say**

**On with the story**

EPOV

The swamp was dark and the air was moist. I carefully lead Bella through the mess of roots and twigs on the ground while holding branches out of her face. She had asked several questions, I was currently answering her 'If you were captured by the dread Pirate Roberts then why aren't you dead?' question

"Remember the story I told you about how I 'died'" she nodded "Well, you see, it was all true, except for the 'deal' that is. Roberts liked me and made me his assistant. Eventually he gave me the title of 'Dread Pirate Roberts'. Actually the 'Dread Pirate' I received the title from wasn't the real Dread Pirate Roberts, his name was Ryan. The 'dread pirate' he received the title from wasn't Roberts either, it turns out the real Dread Pirate Roberts retired years ago." I stopped talking and helped her over a large fallen tree. Surprisingly enough she stopped asking questions about me and started on the Fire Swamp.

"Why is it so dreaded?"

"Because of the three terrors." I answered

"And the terrors are…?"

"The three terrors of the fire swamp are fire spurts and lightning sand,"

"What about the third one?" she asked impatiently

"Well the third one is rodents of unusual size…" I responded. Just then I had noticed two things; we had stopped walking and there was a horrible sputtering noise coming from nearby. All of the sudden, sparks came flying out of no where and caught Bella on fire! Well just her dress but fire none the less. She screamed and ran around in small circles, I tried to stamp out the fire but she kept moving, so I grabbed her roughly and lowered her to the ground where I was finally able to put out the fire.

"We'll never make it out of here alive." She whined

"Nonsense, your only saying that because no one ever has." I said with a smile. By now we were walking again

"Well that was an adventure and a half." I said trying to lighten the mood** (sorry but I've ALWAYS wanted to say that, or make someone else say it)** she smiled slightly. Great, more sputtering, this time I picked her up and spun her to my left, away from the sputtering. By the time her feet hit the ground, sparks were flying everywhere, but not close enough to hit us. Her eyes were wide

"If we just do this we'll be fine." I told her, she looked a little less worried. Before I knew it she was asking more questions

"Okay so we know how to avoid the fire spurts but what about the other ones, lightning sand or the third one…rodents of unusual size?'

"Well to avoid the lightning sand just stay away from white sand."

"Oh-" she screamed, I turned around just in time to se her head plunge into some sand

"NOOOO! BELLA!" I looked around and grabbed the end of a long vine. I squeezed it and jumped in after her.

BPOV

About three things I was absolutely positive: one- I couldn't breathe, two- I couldn't move very easily and three- I was going to die

EPOV

I couldn't hold my breath much longer. It was cold and difficult to move, I was searching for her with my available hand. I had stopped sinking (thanks to the vine) when, what felt like a hand brushed up against my leg and grabbed it. The creature –whom I was almost positive was Bella- started to climb up my leg. I reached down and grabbed her hand, she stopped climbing.

BPOV

I used all my leftover energy to attempt to 'swim' upwards. I 'swam' until my hand touched something firm. I thought it was a tree branch until it flinched. Personally I didn't care what it was, I was almost completely out of breath so I started to 'climb' up it. Something came down and grabbed my arm, out of reflex I screamed, or tried to scream but as soon as I opened my mouth sand poured in, choking me. My eyes closed.

EPOV

She stopped moving, 'HURRY!' my mind screamed, my heartbeat drummed in my ears. 'I can do this' I told myself. I put the vine in my mouth so I-er-we didn't sink and I started to pull us up with my one hand. I was almost too weak to carry us both. My mind was spinning and my heart barley beating, I decided to pull up one last time but I had no more control over my body, I went limp and started to let go…

_Flashback (four hours before Edward left)_

"Please don't leave, I love you, I _need_ you." Bella pleaded

"I love you too, I will return soon, I would never let you down, now would i?" I asked

"No, you wouldn't. Are you sure you'll return soon?"

"Yes."

"Promise?" she asked desperately

"Promise." I returned, she smiled and wiped a tear from her eye

"Thanks." She whispered

_End flashback_

My eyes snapped open, allowing the painful sand to get into them. 'I will never let you down, let you down, let you down…" My own words repeated in my head. With newly found strength I pulled up one last time, my hand broke the surface! This sent adrenaline throughout my body, I pulled up again and my head came out. I filled my lungs with air and continued pulling upwards until we were both out and on sturdy ground.

I quickly rolled Bella onto her back.

"How do you revive someone who drowned in sand?" I asked myself, my question was answered, not by me buy Bella. She rolled onto her side and coughed up a lot of sand.

"Bella? Bella are you okay?" I asked, she coughed

"Yea, just peachy." She said sarcastically. Her voice was very course, I helped her up and brushed excess sand off her.

"Well we've encountered the fire spurts and the lightning sand. Next we're going to get eaten alive by rodents of unusual size." She gagged and coughed

"Personally I don't believe they exist." All of the sudden, something snarled and hit me.

BPOV

"Personally I don't believe they exist." He said, for some reason though, I did not feel any better. All of the sudden there was a viscous snarling noise, a giant brown blob of fur came through the air and hit Edward. They were on the ground, the fight was moving very quickly. All I heard was slight groans coming from Edward and snarls coming from-what I assume was- the rat. All I saw was them rolling around, then… OH MY GAWD! The rat just bit Edward! He called out in pain, this was too much, I grabbed a fairly large/heavy stick and attempted to hit the rat in the head but I only succeeded in making it come after me. Not good, I slowly stepped backwards, never taking my eyes off it. Being the klutz I am, I ended up tripping over my own two feet. There was so much mud and rubble on the ground that I couldn't slide backwards. The rat was now so close it could have bitten my knee, it was about to when out of no where Edward came and stabbed it in the leg. It stopped coming after me and went back over to him. Once again when they were rolling on the ground the rat bit poor Edward, this time in his shoulder, it looked awfully painful. Then, all of the sudden, more sputtering. I looked around to see where it was coming from. It was coming from not more then 6 feet away from Edward and the rat. Edward's next move was very unexpected, he rolled towards the fire spurt. I could have sworn he was crazy when sparks started flying, the rat was set on fire and Edward got up. He walked over and grabbed his sword and stabbed the rat, finally the fight was over.

EPOV

Good riddance.

BPOV

Ug his shoulder looks gross… I hope he's alright.

Jacob the Rats POV

Being re-incarnated sucks.

**So what did you guys think? Personally I laughed my ass of at Jacob's last line XD okay so please review. I will probably update next weekend.**

**I AM STILL TAKING SUGGESTIONS FOR SCENES TO ADD!!**

**Sorry but I had to say it like that :p Thanks for all th reviews everyone!**

**Hey if you guy want something to read check out my friend Raynabow's story 'Poison love' its really good and I think you all might enjoy it.**


	14. Authors note sorry I hate them too

**Okay I hope you guys realize how much I'm sorry about not doing an actual update this weekend. Its just I was still writing on Friday, it was my b-day on Saturday so I had people over (joy) yesterday I had **_**more**_** people over and today well I have homework. To make it up to you guys I'll make sure I post a longer chapter **_**and**_** I'll give you guys a sneak peak of the next chapter.**

**Disclaimer: Ich besitze Zwielicht oder die Prinzessin-Braut nicht or in other words I don't own Twilight or the Princess bride.**

**Oh before I go on, check out my poll**

EPOV

Searing pains shot op my arm. 'Stupid rat' I thought bitterly. Almost immediately after the rat was dead Bella ran over and buried her face in my chest, getting my blood all over her.

"That was terrifying, are you alright Edward? Your arm looks terribly painful." She asked me, her voice full of concern.

"I'll be alright, it looks worse then it feels." I lied, it felt way worse then it looked.

"I-I think we s-should get going, before another one shows up." She was undoubtedly talking about the rats.

"Excellent idea." I brushed myself off and pretended I was facing no pain what-so-ever.

We started walking again, and just like we were when we first entered the swamp, I was carefully leading her through the mess of roots and debris on the ground. We walked for hours, then we saw what we were looking for. A light in the distance, an opening, a spark of hope, of survival. We walked toward it, completely unaware of what was going to happen next.

**Well once again I'm sorry for the incomplete chapter, please forgive me. Once again please check out my poll, pm or review with suggestions for scenes. I'll update asap. Thanks for all the reviews people!  
**


	15. Chapter 13

**Okay so I'm sorry about the last chapter. I'll try not to do that again, so here is the next bit of chapter 13. Enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: Ich besitze nichts! (I don't own anything!)**

EPOV

Searing pains shot op my arm. 'Stupid rat' I thought bitterly. Almost immediately after the rat was dead Bella ran over and buried her face in my chest, getting my blood all over her.

"That was terrifying, are you alright Edward? Your arm looks terribly painful." She asked me, her voice full of concern.

"I'll be alright, it looks worse then it feels." I lied, it felt way worse then it looked.

"I-I think we s-should get going, before another one shows up." She was undoubtedly talking about the rats.

"Excellent idea." I brushed myself off and pretended I was facing no pain what-so-ever.

We started walking again, and just like we were when we first entered the swamp, I was carefully leading her through the mess of roots and debris on the ground. We walked for hours, then we saw what we were looking for. A light in the distance, an opening, a spark of hope, of survival. We walked toward it, completely unaware of what was going to happen next.

As we approached the light my thoughts wandered, eventually to Newton. I wondered where he was and if he was still following us. If he was, I wondered if he was waiting for us on the other side of the swamp of still looking. Whatever was going to happen next, I will be ready for it.

To be honest, a part of me wanted her to be taken by Newton, not because I don't love her but because I want her to be safe, I mean she's been burnt, nearly suffocated and almost eaten alive. But I don't, nor will I ever regret saving her from those other mongrels, mainly the balding guy. The other two didn't seem to want any herm to come to her. Now I wonder what happened to them, I hope dearly that their alright but I have much bigger things to worry about, like where we are going to go after we get out of this hell-hole.

Fresh dry air hit my face as we stepped out of the dense greenery. I probably should have been shocked, or even angry when I saw Newton and his 6 other men waiting for us, but I wasn't even very surprised. I wanted more then ever then to wipe that smug smile off his face.

"You!" he said accusingly, Bella gasped softly. I knew he was someone she really didn't want to see again

"Surrender now and I promise no harm will come to you." He said smugly. Over my dead body! I heard slight rustling of leaves coming from every direction but I decided to fight.

"You know, we know the secrets of the Fire Swamp and we could live their quite happily for some time so whenever you feel like dying-" I trailed off, he looked shocked and I mean completely inarticulate. I saw Bella look around quickly

"Will you promise not to hurt him?" Bella asked desperately

"What?!" Newton exclaimed

"What?!" I exclaimed confused. What was she doing?

"If I go with you will you promise not to hurt him?" she asked again but with slightly more detail. Did she want to leave me that bad? Had that last incident been too much?

"Of course! Of course!" Newton said trying to look honest but I could see the lie in his eyes. Bella whispered an okay and walked over to him, triumph shone in his features.

"He is a sailor on the pirate ship revenge, please make sure he gets there."

"Don't worry about a thing, James here will take care of everything." He said motioning to a blondish guy, also on a horse. with that he lifted her up onto his horse then they rode off. Leaving me, and the 6 other men alone. I looked up at James.

"Were all men here," I started "Lets drop the lies shall we"

"With pleasure" he said. I don't know what but there was just something about him I didn't like, besides the fact he was probably going to kill me. I looked at him trying to figure it out when I noticed something.

"You have 6 fingers on your right hand, someone was looking for you." I said looking at his face, it changed from smugness, to anger, to something unreadable. All of the sudden he pulled out his sword and hit me in the forehead with the handle. As I hit the ground I could feel people moving around, I felt cold hands hoist me up and then I don't remember anything.

BPOV

I can't believe I had to ride with this, this beast. I would have much rather been facing the consequences with Edward right now but they would have killed him. I really hope he was okay, after all this was all my fault. If I hadn't slowed him down in the swamp he would have made it out before Prince Newton got there, heck, if it weren't for me he wouldn't have been in there to begin with. At least he will be sent back to his ship.

It took forever to reach the castle but when we did I was dragged to my room. I went over to my bed to think but eventually fell asleep.

_I awoke to people shuffling along the floor. I got up to see what was going on and the king was dead. This was horrible, Prince Newton came over to hold me but I shrugged him off and went back to my room. _

_The next morning I tried to leave my room but Prince Newton came in, he gave me a stunning emerald green dress _the same as Edward's eyes _I thought and he told me to put it on then meet him in the dining hall. I followed directions and he told me that I was going to meet the townspeople for the first time as their queen._

_It was time now, Prince Newton had just walked out onto the balcony and had started talking. He just said my name, that's my cue, I slowly walked out into the town center just as I was told. Everyone started to kneel, then I heard someone speak or actually yell would be more appropriate._

"_BOO! BOO! BOOOO!" _

_I turned and an elderly woman was yelling at me_

"_Why do you do this?" I asked_

"_Because you had something much better, you had true love." She said to me "She had true love and she threw it away!" The old lady yelled to everyone_

"_They would have killed him!" I tried to explain_

"_Death can not stop true love! Without it you are the queen of nothing, the queen of slime THE QUEEN OF PUTRESCENCE! BOO! BOO! BOOOO!" she screamed_

**Well I think I'm going to have to end it there. CHECK OUT MY POLL PLEASE! ITS FOR THE GOOD OF THIS STORY! Okay well please review! Thanks to everyone who has so far :) **

**Hey if you want to read a really good story check out Raynabow's story "Poison Love"**

**Nigel or formally known as edwardXD**


	16. should i continue?

Sorry nothing special but I'm not supposed to be on the computer right now and I'm sorry I haven't updated in a bout 2 wee

**Sorry nothing special but I'm not supposed to be on the computer right now and I'm sorry I haven't updated in a bout 2 weeks but I am not sure if I should continue this story or not.**

**If you want this story to continue please let me know or if you would like to continue it for me let me know.**

**If it is voted that I continue I probably wont update for a little while… at least until I'm done school and my arm isn't it a brace that prevents me from typing well. I do have a couple of one shots I would like to write too so… please let me know.**


	17. MAJOR AUTHORS NOTE MUST READ!

**Okay, i was able to get on my parents laptop for about 20 mins so i wrote this. my parents decided to wait until the end of September to replace our broken computer so i wont be able to update any of my stories until then at least.**

**i will continue planning and writing stories in my notebook but i need to know one thing, after 'Oh the irony' what shorter story would you like my to focus on next?**

**'We need WHAT!?'**

**plot: as a punishment the cullen kids have to get jobs. But what happens when when the jobs are randomly drawn? sheer disaster.**

**'Art Class'**

**plot: 10 years after Bella is changed the Cullens move to well i don't know yet and enrol in new high school. One day in art class the teacher assigns a project, to create a word or phrase and turn it into believable graffiti. (yea this is lame and i just realized that :p i wrote is after 4 days without sleep)**

**'Bored'**

**plot: They got bored and so did i, but unlike me they didn't stare at the celing for hours. Read this totally boring (kidding) stpry about what he cullens do when hey get bored. warning! includes scenes that may not make sense**

**'Random sayings, phrases and other nonsense'**

**plot: i think the name says it all. there will be skits, sayings, and random other things. great for laughs!**


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